			Philz Lap -- Issue One
				

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"Phil Makes a Move on Katie"

+ by an anonymous source



*soybeanB* stock up on your butter

[soybean] haha

[soybean] there is a BUTTER SHORTAGE

[soybean] oh owen

-> *soybeanB* i know. that's the craziest thing i've ever heard

[soybean] i should share with you what happened with murmur last night

[soybean] butter is the one thing that shoudl always be around

[soybean] hahaha

[soybean] hopefully not!@

[soybean] but:

[soybean] i got bored last night so i demanded he tell me a story

-> *soybeanB* there's always soy butter

[soybean] so he talked about academic bowl in high school for awhile

-> *soybeanB* yeah

[soybean] soy!

[soybean] and so anyway

[soybean] he started telling me that i have all this potential and i
can do
          amazing things

[soybean] but i really need to do something with it

[soybean] generic stuff

-> *soybeanB* heh

[soybean] and then he said that, like, I need to marry him right now

[soybean] which was funny, and dumb

-> *soybeanB* "do something

-> *soybeanB* HAHAHAHAHAHHA

[soybean] but then SOMEHOW

-> *soybeanB* oh no

[soybean] for NO APPARENT REASON

[soybean] he started talking about how he's kissed six girls in the
last
          six months

[soybean] but he's not, like, a WHORE or anything

[soybean] but idle smooching is getting old

[soybean] and then he talked about

[soybean] how he used to feel weird during idle smooching because he's

          always been less experienced than the girls he's with

[soybean] the entire time i just say "okay"

[soybean] so he went on to tell me that he feels fine now since he's
done
          it enough to feel certain he has certain techniques down

-> *soybeanB* i think i just woke my dad up by laughing

[soybean] and then he said:  "i'd be willing to demonstrate my
techniques
          if you're up for it :) :) :)

[soybean] "

[soybean] hahahaha

-> *soybeanB* now owen just woke his dad up with screams of fear

[soybean] HAHA

-> *soybeanB* was he SERIOUS?

[soybean] i was, like, hysterical throughout

[soybean] YES

-> *soybeanB* oh my fucking god

[soybean] this was like the THIRD TIME he'd mentioned it

[soybean] hahaha

[soybean] i for some reason told him about that dream i had a few days
ago
[soybean] and after it he just said

[soybean] "well, i'm kinda cute, you know!@"

[soybean] hahaha

[soybean] <important> katie, go to Ohio State University

[soybean] <soybean> why?

[soybean] <important> then we can get married!

-> *soybeanB* ha

-> *soybeanB* did he just say that

[soybean] <important> i'm inclined to think that you ought to be my
best
          friend

[soybean] no

[soybean] this is from last night :)

[soybean] i logged it

-> *soybeanB* oh

-> *soybeanB* haha

[soybean] haha

-> *soybeanB* will you log everything for  me? :)

[soybean] <important> i really hope that i experience more life and
then
          meet someone just like you

[soybean] <important> who's a lot like me in the ways i would want
someone
          to be like me, but who

[soybean] isn't quite at the same point i am

[soybean] everything murmur? :)

[soybean] <important> c'mon over :)

[soybean] <important> just marry me now

[soybean] <important> we'll figure out the rest later

-> *soybeanB* something is seriously wrong with him

[soybean] haha

[soybean] yes.

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The first issue of Philz Lap was complete on June 24, 1998. Send any 
conversations dealing with kissing techniques to toasty@sky.net.

